Jar No 274

Jar No 274
Kirsty Hall: Jar No 274, Oct 2011

Jar No 274 in situ
Kirsty Hall: Jar No 274 in situ, Oct 2011

Contents: Photograph
Released into wild: 2/10/11 at 1.36 (should have been 1/10/11 but it wasn’t – see below for details!)
General Location: Clifton, Bristol
Status: Found by Ian on 03/10/2011

Comments:

Ah yes.

This.

You may think this jar contains a photograph: it actually contains a dramatic crisis.

Jar No 274 close up
Kirsty Hall: Jar No 274 close up, Oct 2011

This would be the day when I completely lost the plot and missed my deadline because I was having an emotional crisis.

After two hours of trying and failing to make a jar that I was happy with, I ended up sobbing hysterically in my bathroom, swearing at myself, the project and my life. At 5 minutes to midnight, with no jar made, I accepted the truth – I was going to properly miss my deadline. And not by a single minute either.

I suppose it was inevitable. I’ve been under massive amounts of stress lately since my entire world imploded back in May. The last two weeks have been sheer hell – there’s been a temporary lull in the huge amount of practical stuff, so the full emotional impact of the break-up finally hit me. And it hit me hard. I’ve been a complete sobbing mess. That’s what happens when you bottle things up and try not to feel them!

I wibbled at my remaining partner and he patiently made ‘there, there’ noises and calmed me down.

Then I seriously considered stopping the entire project because I was just so damn tired. Did I really want to go on with this? The words, “it doesn’t matter, they’re just stupid jars. Why are you doing this to yourself? What kind of bizarre self-punishment is this anyway?” may have passed my lips.

And then I picked myself up, dusted myself off, made a jar that would pass muster and photographed it. I faffed around for another half hour wondering whether to just go to bed instead of walking it because I was tired down to my soul. But I decided to be brave and just get it done, so I wobbled out into the middle of the night, avoided the drunks and placed my damn jar. Only an hour and 36 minutes late.

Afterwards I sat on a park bench and looked at the stars. And cried some more. And then said out loud, “well, I care about the project, it matters to me and I need this discipline, so I’m going to carry on.”

Drama over. Project carrying on.

………….

This jar has been found already:

I’ve seen or collected a jar: Collected a jar

Number on lid of jar: 274

Your name (optional): Ian

Date jar found (optional): 03/10/2011

If you collected a jar, what motivated you to pick it up? (optional): Intrigued

Where is the jar now? (optional): Pride of Place on my Mantlepiece

Well done, Ian, it’s nice to hear from a new finder instead of all our regulars.


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3 Comments

  1. You have a lot of Jar Fans that care too. :>

    You’ve brought a lot of brightness & beauty into this world with this project. :>

    So take care of yourself, take a rest if you need to, but I hope that when you are done resting you will pick up this project once again. :>

    And congrats on getting that Jar out there despite everything! :-)

    That was very brave & determined.
    Brava! :>

    • kirsty

       /  October 22, 2011

      Thanks Birdy. I’m late replying to comments but your kind words meant a lot to me.

  1. Jar No 275 | 365 Jars
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